rh.theassassinsapprentice-第12部分

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to　anyone；　that　I　heard。　But　again；　in　looking　back；　I　cannot　imagine　to　whom　he　could　have　made　plaint。　Locked　into　loneliness　were　we　two；　and　looking　at　one　another　every　evening；　we　each　saw　the　one　we　blamed　for　it。
　　　　　　　Yet　all　things　must　pass；　but　especially　time；　and　with　the　months　and　then　the　years；　I　came　slowly　to　have　a　place　in　the　scheme　of　things。　I　fetched　for　Burrich；　bringing　before　he　had　thought　to　ask　for　it；　and　tidied　up　after　his　ministrations　to　the　beasts；　and　saw　to　clean　water　for　the　hawks　and　picked　ticks　off　dogs　e　home　from　the　hunt。　Folk　got　used　to　seeing　me　and　no　longer　stared。　Some　seemed　not　to　see　me　at　all。　Gradually　Burrich　relaxed　his　watch　on　me。　I　came　and　went　more　freely；　but　still　took　care　that　he　should　not　know　of　my　sojourns　into　town。
　　　　　　　There　were　other　children　within　the　keep；　many　about　my　own　age。　Some　were　even　related　to　me；　second　cousins　or　third。　Yet　I　never　formed　any　real　bonds　with　any　of　them。　The　younger　ones　were　kept　by　their　mothers　or　caretakers；　the　older　ones　had　their　own　tasks　and　chores　to　occupy　them。　Most　were　not　cruel　to　me；　I　was　simply　outside　their　circles。　So；　although　I　might　not　see　Dirk　or　Kerry　or　Molly　for　months；　they　remained　my　closest　friends。　In　my　explorations　of　the　keep；　and　on　winter　evenings　when　all　gathered　in　the　Great　Hall　for　minstrels；　or　puppet　shows　or　indoor　games；　I　swiftly　learned　where　I　was　wele　and　where　I　was　not。
　　　　　　　I　kept　myself　out　of　the　Queen's　view；　for　whenever　she　saw　me；　she　would　always　find　some　fault　with　my　behavior　and　have　Burrich　reproached　with　it。　Regal；　too；　was　a　source　of　danger。　He　had　most　of　his　man's　growth；　but　did　not　scruple　to　shove　me　out　of　his　path　or　walk　casually　through　whatever　I　had　found　to　play　with。　He　was　capable　of　a　pettiness　and　vindictiveness　that　I　never　encountered　in　Verity。　Not　that　Verity　ever　took　time　with　me；　but　our　chance　encounters　were　never　unpleasant。　If　he　noticed　me；　he　would　tousle　my　hair；　or　offer　me　a　penny。　Once　a　servant　brought　to　Burrich's　quarters　some　little　wooden　toys；　soldiers　and　horses　and　a　cart；　their　paint　much　worn；　with　a　message　that　Verity　had　found　them　in　a　corner　of　his　clothing　chest　and　thought　I　might　enjoy　them。　I　cannot　think　of　any　other　possession　I　ever　valued　more。
　　　　　　　Cob　in　the　stables　was　another　danger　zone。　If　Burrich　were　about；　he　spoke　me　fair　and　treated　me　evenly；　but　had　small　use　for　me　at　other　times。　He　gave　me　to　understand　he　did　not　want　me　about　and　underfoot　where　he　was　working。　I　found　out　eventually　that　he　was　jealous　of　me　and　felt　my　care　had　replaced　the　interest　Burrich　had　once　taken　in　him。　He　was　never　overtly　cruel；　he　never　struck　me　or　scolded　me　unfairly。　But　I　could　sense　his　distaste　for　me；　and　avoided　him。
　　　　　　　All　the　men…at…arms　showed　a　great　tolerance　for　me。　After　the　street　children　of　Buckkeep　Town；　they　were　probably　the　closest　I　had　to　friends。　But　no　matter　how　tolerant　men　may　be　of　a　boy　of　nine　or　ten；　there　is　precious　little　in　mon。　I　watched　their　bone　games　and　listened　to　their　stories；　but　for　every　hour　I　spent　among　their　pany；　there　were　days　when　I　did　not　go　among　them　at　all。　And　while　Burrich　never　forbade　me　the　guardroom；　he　did　not　conceal　that　he　disapproved　of　the　time　I　spent　there。
　　　　　　　So　I　was　and　was　not　a　member　of　the　keep　munity。　I　avoided　some　and　I　observed　some　and　I　obeyed　some。　But　with　none　did　I　feel　a　bond。
　　　　　　　Then　one　morning；　when　I　was　still　a　bit　shy　of　my　tenth　year；　I　was　at　play　under　the　tables　in　the　Great　Hall；　tumbling　and　teasing　with　the　puppies。　It　was　quite　early　in　the　day。　There　had　been　an　occasion　of　some　sort　the　day　before；　and　the　feasting　had　lasted　the　whole　day　and　well　into　the　night。　Burrich　had　drunk　himself　senseless。　Almost　everyone；　noble　or　servants；　was　still　abed；　and　the　kitchen　had　not　yielded　up　much　to　my　hungry　venturing　that　morning。　But　the　tables　in　the　Great　Hall　were　a　trove　of　broken　pastries　and　dishes　of　meat。　There　were　bowls　of　apples　as　well；　slabs　of　cheese；　in　short；　all　a　boy　could　wish　for　plundering。　The　great　dogs　had　taken　the　best　bones　and　retreated　to　their　own　corners　of　the　hall；　leaving　various　pups　to　scrabble　for　the　smaller　bits。　I　had　taken　a　rather　large　meat　pasty　under　the　table　and　was　sharing　it　out　with　my　chosen　favorites　among　the　pups。　Ever　since　Nosy；　I　had　taken　care　that　Burrich　should　not　see　me　to　have　too　great　an　affinity　with　any　one　puppy。　I　still　did　not　understand　why　he　objected　to　my　closeness　to　a　hound；　but　I　would　not　risk　the　life　of　a　puppy　to　dispute　it　with　him。　So　I　was　alternating　bites　with　three　whelps　when　I　heard　slow　footsteps　threshing　across　the　reed…strewn　floor。　Two　men　were　speaking；　discussing　something　in　low　tones。
　　　　　　　I　thought　it　was　the　kitchen　servants；　e　to　clear　away。　I　scrabbled　from　beneath　the　table　to　snare　a　few　more　choice　leavings　before　they　were　gone。
　　　　　　　But　it　was　no　servant　who　startled　at　my　sudden　appearance　but　the　old　King；　my　grandfather　himself。　A　scant　step　behind　him；　at　his　elbow；　was　Regal。　His　bleary　eyes　and　rumpled　doublet　attested　to　his　participation　in　last　night's　revelries。　The　King's　new　fool；　but　recently　acquired；　pattered　after　them；　pale　eyes　agoggle　in　an　eggshell　face。　He　was　so　strange　a　creature；　with　his　pasty　skin　and　motley　all　of　blacks　and　whites；　that　I　scarce　dared　to　look　at　him。　In　contrast；　King　Shrewd　was　clear　of　eye；　his　beard　and　hair　freshly　groomed；　and　his　clothing　immaculate。　For　an　instant　he　was　surprised；　and　then　remarked；　〃You　see；　Regal；　it　is　as　I　was　telling　you。　An　opportunity　presents　itself；　and　someone　seizes　it；　often　someone　young；　or　someone　driven　by　the　energies　and　hungers　of　youth。　Royalty　has　no　leisure　to　ignore　such　opportunities；　or　to　let　them　be　created　for　others。〃
　　　　　　　The　King　continued　his　stroll　past　me；　extolling　on　his　theme　while　Regal　gave　me　a　baleful　look　from　bloodshot　eyes。　A　flap　of　his　hand　indicated　that　I　should　disappear　myself。　I　indicated　my　understanding　with　a　quick　nod；　but　darted　first　to　the　table。　I　stuffed　two　apples　into　my　jerkin　and　took　up　a　mostly　whole　gooseberry　tart　when　the　King　suddenly　rounded　and　gestured　at　me。　His　fool　mimed　an　imitation。　I　froze　where　I　stood。
　　　　　　　〃Look　at　him；〃　the　old　King　manded。
　　　　　　　Regal　glared　at　me；　but　I　dared　not　move。
　　　　　　　〃What　will　you　make　of　him？〃
　　　　　　　Regal　looked　perplexed。　〃Him？　It's　the　Fitz。　Chivalry's　bastard。　Sneaking　and　thieving　as　always。〃
　　　　　　　〃Fool。〃　King　Shrewd　smiled；　but　his　eyes　remained　flinty。　The　Fool；　thinking　himself　addressed；　smiled　sweetly。　〃Are　your　ears　stopped　with　wax？　Do　you　hear　nothing　I　say？　I　asked　you；　not　'what　do　you　make　of　him？'　but　'what　will　you　make　of　him？'　There　he　stands；　young；　strong；　and　resourceful。　His　lines　are　every　bit　as　royal　as　yours；　for　all　that　he　was　born　on　the　wrong　side　of　the　sheets。　So　what　will　you　make　of　him？　A　tool？　A　weapon？　A　rade？　An　enemy？　Or　will　you　leave　him　lying　about；　for　someone　else　to　take　up　and　use　against　you？〃
　　　　　　　Regal　squinted　at　me；　then　glanced　past　me　and；　finding　no　one　else　in　the　hall；　returned　his　puzzled　gaze　to　me。　At　my　ankle；　a　pup　whined　a　reminder　that　earlier　we　had　been　sharing。　I　warned　him　to　hush。
　　　　　　　〃The　bastard？　He's　only　a　child。〃
　　　　　　　The　old　King　sighed。　〃Today。　This　morning　and　now　he　is　a　child。　When　next　you　turn　around　he　will　be　a　youth；　or　worse；　a　man；　and　then　it　will　be　too　late　for　you　to　make　anything　of　him。　But　take　him　now；　Regal；　and　shape　him；　and　a　decade　hence　you　will　mand　his　loyalty。　Instead　of　a　discontented　bastard　who　may　be　persuaded　to　bee　a　pretender　to　the　throne；　he　will　be　a　henchman；　united　to　the　family　by　spirit　as　well　as　blood。　A　bastard；　Regal；　is　a　unique　thing。　Put　a　signet　ring　on　his　hand　and　send　him　forth；　and　you　have　created　a　diplomat　no　foreign　ruler　will　dare　to　turn　away。　He　may　safely　be　sent　where　a　prince　of　the　blood　may　not　be　risked。　Imagine　the　uses　for　one　who　is　and　yet　is　not　of　the　royal　bloodline。　Hostage　exchanges。　Marital　alliances。　Quiet　work。　The　diplomacy　of　the　knife。〃
　　　　　　　Regal's　eyes　grew　round　at　the　King's　last　words。　For　a　paus