rh.theassassinsapprentice-第84部分

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o　buy　some　leather　harness；　I　could　go　elsewhere　and　stop　bothering　him。　I　thought　of　the　young　man　I　had　last　seen　with　Molly；　and　bitterly　wished　them　no　good　of　each　other。
　　　　　　　For　no　other　reason　than　that　I　was　lonely；　I　decided　to　seek　out　the　Fool。　Never　before　had　I　tried　to　initiate　a　meeting　with　him。　He　proved　more　elusive　than　I　had　ever　imagined。
　　　　　　　After　a　few　hours　of　randomly　wandering　the　keep；　hoping　to　encounter　him；　I　made　brave　enough　to　go　to　his　chamber。　I　had　known　for　years　where　it　was；　but　had　never　gone　there　before；　and　not　simply　because　it　was　in　an　out…of…the…way　part　of　the　keep。　The　Fool　did　not　invite　intimacy；　except　of　the　kind　he　chose　to　offer；　and　only　when　he　chose　to　offer　it。　His　chambers　were　a　tower…top　room。　Fedwren　had　told　me　that　it　had　once　been　a　map　room　and　had　offered　an　unobstructed　view　of　the　land　surrounding　Buckkeep。　But　later　additions　to　Buckkeep　had　blocked　the　views；　and　higher　towers　supplanted　it。　It　had　outlived　its　usefulness　for　anything；　save　chambers　for　a　fool。
　　　　　　　I　climbed　to　it；　that　one　day　toward　the　beginning　of　harvest　time。　It　was　already　a　hot　and　sticky　day。　The　tower　was　a　closed　one；　save　for　arrow　slits　that　did　little　more　than　illuminate　the　dust　motes　my　feet　set　to　dancing　in　the　still　air。　At　first　the　darkness　of　the　tower　had　seemed　cooler　than　the　stuffy　day　outside；　but　as　I　climbed；　it　seemed　to　get　hotter　and　more　close；　so　that　by　the　time　I　reached　the　last　landing；　I　felt　as　if　there　were　no　air　left　to　breathe　at　all。　I　lifted　a　weary　fist　and　pounded　on　the　stout　door。　〃It's　me；　Fitz！〃　I　called；　but　the　still　hot　air　muffled　my　voice　like　a　wet　blanket　smothering　a　flame。
　　　　　　　Shall　I　use　that　as　an　excuse？　Shall　I　say　I　thought　perhaps　he　could　not　hear　me；　and　so　I　went　in　to　see　if　he　was　there？　Or　shall　I　say　that　I　was　so　hot　and　thirsty　that　I　entered　to　see　if　his　chambers　offered　any　hint　of　air　or　water？　Why　doesn't　matter；　I　suppose。　I　put　my　hand　to　the　door　latch；　and　it　lifted　and　I　went　inside。
　　　　　　　〃Fool？〃　I　called；　but　I　could　feel　he　wasn't　there。　Not　as　I　usually　felt　folk's　presence　or　absence；　but　by　the　stillness　that　met　me。　Yet　I　stood　in　the　door　and　gawked　at　a　soul　laid　bare。
　　　　　　　Here　was　light；　and　flowers；　and　colors　in　profusion。　There　was　a　loom　in　the　corner；　and　baskets　of　fine；　thin　thread　in　bright；　bright　colors。　The　woven　coverlet　on　the　bed　and　the　drapings　on　the　open　windows　were　unlike　anything　I　had　ever　seen；　woven　in　geometric　patterns　that　somehow　suggested　fields　of　flowers　beneath　a　blue　sky。　A　wide　pottery　bowl　held　floating　flowers　and　a　slim　silver　fingerling　swam　about　the　stems　and　above　the　bright　pebbles　that　floored　it。　I　tried　to　imagine　the　colorless；　cynical　Fool　in　the　midst　of　all　this　color　and　art。　I　took　a　step　farther　into　the　room；　and　saw　something　that　moved　my　heart　aside　in　my　chest。
　　　　　　　A　baby。　That　was　what　I　took　it　for　at　first；　and　without　thinking；　I　took　the　next　two　steps　and　knelt　beside　the　basket　that　cradled　it。　But　it　was　not　a　living　child；　but　a　doll；　crafted　with　such　incredible　art　that　almost　I　expected　to　see　the　small　chest　move　with　breath。　I　reached　a　hand　to　the　pale；　delicate　face；　but　dared　not　touch　it。　The　curve　of　the　brow；　the　closed　eyelids；　the　faint　rose　that　suffused　the　tiny　cheeks；　even　the　small　hand　that　rested　atop　the　coverlets　were　more　perfect　than　I　supposed　a　made　thing　could　be。　Of　what　delicate　clay　it　had　been　crafted；　I　could　not　guess；　nor　what　hand　had　inked　the　tiny　eyelashes　that　curled　on　the　infant's　cheek。　The　tiny　coverlet　was　embroidered　all　over　in　pansies；　and　the　pillow　was　of　satin。　I　don't　know　how　long　I　knelt　there；　as　silent　as　if　it　were　truly　a　sleeping　babe。　But　eventually　I　rose；　and　backed　out　of　the　Fool's　room；　and　then　drew　the　door　silently　closed　behind　me。　I　went　slowly　down　the　myriad　steps；　torn　between　dread　that　I　might　encounter　the　Fool　ing　up　and　burdened　with　the　knowledge　that　I　had　discovered　one　denizen　of　the　keep　who　was　at　least　as　alone　as　I　was。
　　　　　　　Chade　summoned　me　that　night；　but　when　I　went　to　him；　he　seemed　to　have　no　more　purpose　in　calling　me　than　to　see　me。　We　sat　almost　silently　before　the　black　hearth；　and　I　thought　he　looked　older　than　he　ever　had。　As　Verity　was　devoured；　so　Chade　was　consumed。　His　bony　hands　appeared　almost　desiccated；　and　the　whites　of　his　eyes　were　webbed　with　red。　He　needed　to　sleep；　but　instead　had　chosen　to　call　me。　Yet　he　sat；　still　and　silent；　scarce　nibbling　at　the　food　he　had　placed　before　us。　At　length；　I　decided　to　help　him。
　　　　　　　〃Are　you　afraid　I　won't　be　able　to　do　it？〃　I　asked　him　softly。
　　　　　　　〃Do　what？〃　he　asked　absently。
　　　　　　　〃Kill　the　mountain　Prince。　Rurisk。〃
　　　　　　　Chade　turned　to　look　at　me　full　face。　The　silence　held　for　a　long　moment。
　　　　　　　〃You　didn't　know　King　Shrewd　had　given　me　this；〃　I　faltered。
　　　　　　　Slowly　he　turned　back　to　the　empty　hearth　and　studied　it　as　carefully　as　if　there　were　flames　to　read。　〃I'm　only　the　toolmaker；〃　he　said　at　last；　quietly。　〃Another　man　uses　what　I　make。〃
　　　　　　　〃Do　you　think　this　is　a　bad　。。。　task？　Wrong？〃　I　took　a　breath。　〃From　what　I've　been　told；　he　has　not　that　much　longer　to　live　anyway。　It　might　almost　be　a　mercy；　if　death　were　to　e　quietly　in　the　night；　instead　of…〃
　　　　　　　〃Boy；〃　Chade　remarked　quietly。　〃Never　pretend　we　are　anything　but　what　we　are。　Assassins。　Not　merciful　agents　of　a　wise　king。　Political　assassins　dealing　death　for　the　furtherance　of　our　monarchy。　That　is　what　we　are。〃
　　　　　　　It　was　my　turn　to　study　the　ghosts　of　the　flames。　〃You　are　making　this　very　hard　for　me。　Harder　than　it　already　was。　Why？　Why　did　you　make　me　what　I　am；　if　you　then　try　to　weaken　my　resolve　。。。　？〃　My　question　died　away；　half…formed。
　　　　　　　〃I　think　。。。　never　mind。　Maybe　it　is　a　kind　of　jealousy　in　me；　my　boy。　I　wonder；　I　suppose；　why　Shrewd　uses　you　instead　of　me。　Maybe　I　fear　I　have　outlived　my　usefulness　to　him。　Maybe；　now　that　I　know　you；　I　wish　I　had　never　set　out　to　make　you　what　。。。〃　And　it　was　Chade's　turn　to　fall　silent；　his　thoughts　going　where　his　words　could　not　follow　them。
　　　　　　　We　sat　contemplating　my　assignment。　This　was　not　a　serving　of　a　king's　justice。　This　was　not　a　death　sentence　for　a　crime。　This　was　a　simple　removal　of　a　man　who　was　an　obstacle　to　greater　power。　I　sat　still　until　I　began　to　wonder　if　I　would　do　it。　Then　I　lifted　my　eyes　to　a　silver　fruit　knife　driven　deep　into　Chade's　mantelpiece；　and　I　thought　I　knew　the　answer。
　　　　　　　〃Verity　has　made　plaint；　on　your　behalf；〃　Chade　said　suddenly。
　　　　　　　〃plaint？〃　I　asked　weakly。
　　　　　　　〃To　Shrewd。　First；　that　Galen　had　mistreated　you　and　cheated　you。　This　plaint　he　made　formally；　saying　that　he　had　deprived　the　kingdom　of　your　Skill；　at　a　time　when　it　would　have　been　most　useful。　He　suggested　to　Shrewd；　informally；　that　he　settle　it　with　Galen；　before　you　took　matters　into　your　own　hands。〃
　　　　　　　Looking　at　Chade's　face；　I　could　see　that　the　full　content　of　my　discussion　with　Verity　had　been　revealed　to　him。　I　was　not　sure　how　I　felt　about　that。　〃I　would　not　do　that；　take　my　own　revenge　on　Galen。　Not　after　Verity　asked　me　not　to。〃
　　　　　　　Chade　gave　me　a　look　of　quiet　approval。　〃So　I　told　Shrewd。　But　he　said　to　me　that　I　must　say　to　you　that　he　will　settle　this。　This　time　the　King　works　his　own　justice。　You　must　wait　and　be　satisfied。〃
　　　　　　　〃What　will　he　do？〃
　　　　　　　〃That　I　do　not　know。　I　do　not　think　Shrewd　himself　knows　yet。　The　man　must　be　rebuked。　But　we　must　keep　in　mind　that　if　other　coteries　are　to　be　trained；　Galen　must　not　feel　too　badly　treated。〃　Chade　cleared　his　throat　and　said　more　quietly；　〃And　Verity　made　another　plaint　to　the　King　as　well。　He　accused　Shrewd　and　me；　quite　bluntly；　of　being　willing　to　sacrifice　you　for　the　sake　of　the　kingdom。〃
　　　　　　　This；　I　knew　suddenly；　was　why　Chade　had　called　me　tonight。　I　was　silent。
　　　　　　　Chade　spoke　more　slowly。　〃Shrewd　claimed　he　had　not　even　considered　it。　For　my　part；　I　had　no　idea　such　a　thing　was　possible。〃　He　sighed　again；　as　if　parting　with　these　words　cost　him。　〃Shrewd　is　a　king；　my　boy。　His　first　concern　must　always　be　for　his　kingdom。〃
　　　　　　　The　silence　between　us　stretched　long。　〃You　are　saying